John Kerry Can't Tell A Joke; Bush Is One

I'm a terrible joke teller. First, I can never remember the specifics of a decent joke to really convey it the way it's meant to be told. I end up half way through saying, "This part was really really funny. You'd love it....(getting frustrated). DAMN! If I could just remember how it went!

So I admire John Kerry, Massachusetts senator and former presidential candidate, for attempting to make light of the debacle the current administration has put the U.S. in in Iraq. When Kerry said, "get educated or wind up in Iraq" he had obviously left out a few words from the remarks his speechwriter provided. The real sentence was probably something like, "get educated, get a degree or you'll end up behaving like George W. -- sending our troops to Iraq with no plan to bring them home and wondering why we're still there long after Saddam has been caught."

Actually, Kerry's botched "joke" attempt is probably more funny than the speechwriter's pithy language. But, in typical political fashion, the Republicans have to place their stranglehold of wrath on Kerry's neck for bumbling his remarks.

It's not like George W. has never uttered something silly. Strategery? I always loved that one. And what about:

"One of the things I've used on the Google is to pull up maps. It's very interesting to see -- I've forgot the name of the program -- but you get the satellite, and you can -- like, I kinda like to look at the ranch. It remind me of where I wanna be sometimes."

and

"You know, one of the hardest parts of my job is to connect Iraq to the war on terror."

and

"I said I was looking for a book to read, Laura said you ought to try Camus. I also read three Shakespeares. ... I've got a eck-a-lec-tic reading list."

and

"I would guess, I would surmise that some of the more spectacular bombings are done by al Qaeda suiciders."

and

"We shouldn't fear a world that is more interacted."

and

"I would say the best moment of all was when I caught a 7.5 pound largemouth bass in my lake." --George W. Bush, on his best moment in office, interview with the German newspaper Bild am Sonntag, May 7, 2006

and, finally...

"I think -- tide turning -- see, as I remember -- I was raised in the desert, but tides kind of -- it's easy to see a tide turn -- did I say those words?"--George W. Bush, asked if the tide was turning in Iraq, Washington, D.C., June 14, 2006

So kudos go to Kerry - for not only botching the joke in the first place (which I can relate to) but for sticking to his guns and refusing to apologize to the Republican political machine.

Bush said Kerry owes our troops an apology (yes he actually uttered those very words). Now that's the REAL joke when recognizing the mouth the words came from!

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