Going EMO

My daughter and her friends can laugh like there’s no tomorrow one moment and in the next instant be bitter at someone for a comment that was most assuredly said without any malice. It’s these highly emotional (EMO) swings that a parent expects from their pre-teen and teenage children who are trying to figure out life. Fortunately, with a little parental guidance, most kids fix their problems. Sometimes that fix is as simple as a few days of “no phone calls or TMs with Megan,” or whoever the sniper happened to be who instigated the latest EMO moment.

When adults, however, allow themselves to snipe and unleash their cat claws over an action or comment, my patience runs thin. Adults (and I use that term loosely) should rely on the coping skills they’ve learned and developed when life situations happen, whether in the workplace, at a family event, or with a significant other or close friends. Unfortunately some people can’t cope. They take an issue and run headlong with it like a bible-thumping evangelist without a congregation – eventually erupting in divisive and immature behavior.

There are so many wonderful outlets to deal with EMO issues. Journaling. Music. Meditation. Peer counseling. Even self-talk in the car where no one can talk back – because, after all, it’s not specific advice we need during such periods, but time. Time to understand what’s happened and why. Time to ponder and reflect on the circumstances. Time to heal the wounds. Then, to reach out and forgive. Because – if a 16-year-old, hormonally filled teenager can bounce right back from an EMO setback with her best friend or boyfriend, then a mature, grown, educated, thoughtful, respecting adult should be able to trump that and then some.

Digs and barbs may feel good as a release mechanism. Go ahead…think them. Say them out loud to yourself. Smile at how witty it would be to sting that former friend or co-worker with your pithy words. But don’t fall into the gutter and blast someone who’s intentions were always the best and who never gave cause for such lashing out in the past. We all face EMO moments. In the end, no pithy, derogatory phrase can heal a wound like self-realization and forgiveness. It can only spoil the relationship further, causing regret and additional EMO. And life’s too short for that!

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